TAQ? What the heck is that? It stands for "Theoretically Asked Questions." You see, I've only been asked one or two of these questions, but I assume that if anyone ever did want to ask me anything else about the page, it would probably include one or more of these. Hence, Theoretically Asked Questions. Do you hate all anime fans? Considering that I am an anime fan, it'd be pretty stupid if I did, wouldn't it? It's sort of like how I hate people in spite of being one myself. Okay, let me clarify: I hate obnoxious, loudmouthed anime fans who speak in fake Japanese and call their TV sets "terebis" and get orgasmic over anything that's Japanese and animated, even though, quite frankly, there's a lot of anime that really sucks. I hate anime fans who think they're superior to the average gaijin and that any piece of shit out of Japan is a masterwork far greater than anything ever dredged out of the West. (Do you people actually read books, or do you only like it if the pictures are talking to you?) I am perfectly aware that not all anime fans are like this. I simply got fed up with the ones who did and decided to rant about it, and had no idea the rant would attract as much attention as it ended up doing (in large part because, apparently, a lot of other people were fed up with it too). I have no quarrel with you if you watch and enjoy anime without being arrogant about it and inserting cutesy (oh, excuse me, "kawaii") fan-Japanese into everything you type, because frankly, I just like to watch it too. Do you hate all fanfiction writers? No. Nor do I claim that my own fanfiction is perfect. Look at my Writing pages for my commentary on some of the stuff I've written if you want to see how I feel about my own work. I'm simply annoyed by the vast quantity of fanfiction out there written by quasi-illiterates and/or people puppeting the characters to star in their sexual fantasies. Did you get the name Azusa from (insert name of anime here?) No. I made it up before I knew it was a real name (actually, it's both a Japanese name and the name of a town in southern California, the latter of which is popularly claimed to be taken from a store that sold "everything from A to Z in the USA," but which is in fact derived from a Gabrielino Indian word of unknown etymology. Bit of trivia there for you). When are you going to write more stories? I don't know. I'm a bum. I'm also very cynical about fandom these days and, on the off-chance that I do write anything lately, it's far more likely to be a parody than anything else. After having my own writing style pretty much assreamed by pretentious amateur fandom ideas of what constitutes 'good writing,' I don't feel like doing much fanwork these days, and while I have a few ideas for original novels still in draft phases, I won't put those on my websites for copyright reasons (on the chance that, if I ever publish them, I don't want the material to have gotten out beforehand where it has a chance of being plagiarised). What the hell is fanwank? Fanwank is the masturbatory pretentiousness engaged in by many aspiring fanwriters. I am a reformed fanwanker, so I know that of which I speak. Fanwanking can be identified by excessive use of Anne Rice-esque purplish prose, quoting of famous authors, mass quantities of hackneyed metaphors, and general all-around pretensions to writing deep, profound, and/or brilliant works of literature despite the fact that it's about characters created by someone else. Can I illustrate your stories? (yeah, right...) Sure, why not? I welcome any kind of illustration, art, contribution, scribbles, etc. Wow, your stories really suck. Why do you keep subjecting us to this crud? Then quit yer bitchin' and tell me how to make them better. Okay, your stories aren't that bad, but your drawings really suck. What are you using to make them, leftover charcoal briquets? Most of them are made using an ordinary #2 pencil and a piece of computer paper. I never made any claims to being an artist. Hey, you didn't answer my question! This FAQ thing is a rip-off! I want my online time back! Well, these were the questions I thought people would want to ask. Write to me if you have any questions, silly person! |